Today is the first weekday following Christ the King Sunday. Although not mentioned on the Christian calendar, it is widely celebrated as Cyber Monday. Its unofficial saint is St. Steve, the saint of software and protector of apples.
1. If you would have to buy more clothes hangers to accommodate your purchase, DON'T BUY IT.
2. If you would have to build shelves in your garage to hold your overflow, DON'T BUY IT.
3. If you would have to amend your will so your kids won't fight over it someday, DON'T BUY IT.
4. If there's even a remote possibility that there are already six of these in your pantry that haven't yet been opened, DON'T BUY IT.
5. If it would require the assistance of one or more teenagers to figure out how to use it, DON'T BUY IT.
6. If it would only fit after you've been on the New Year's diet you know you won't stick with beyond Martin Luther King Jr. day, DON'T BUY IT.
7. If you hear Desi Arnaz' voice in your head saying, "Lucy, you got lotsa s'plainin' to do", DON'T BUY IT.
8. If you would have to reinforce the subfloor of your house to pack it all in, DON'T BUY IT.
9. If you've given more than six of them to Goodwill in the past five years, DON'T BUY IT.
10. If your kids say, "Mommy, are you and Daddy going to have another discussion?" about it,
DON'T BUY IT.
The late Steve Jobs was pretty widely known as a person who lived simply, so I find it ironic that the computer and software tools that he was partially responsible for making available to consumers are being used to buy into the commercialization of Christmas and other holidays in such a big way. So to honor St. Steve and encourage simple living, I'm going to count my clothes hangers before I go cyber-shopping.
If I have to buy more hangers, I guess I'll stay cyber-home.